The To-Do List
Yesterday, I was feeling particularly accomplished. I mean that most literally – I checked off almost all the things on my “List of Things To Do” – I was able to accomplish them! The feeling of satisfaction was a good one and I will not lie, I enjoy getting things done and crossing things off a list.
My to-do list is likely similar to yours with some tasks that seem to pop up regularly while others only make an appearance once. Each thing listed out needs tending to either because they are important or necessary or sometimes urgent. And so, we attend to these things as we move about our days.
But today is different than yesterday. As I write this, it’s just past noon and I am already half-way through the day and there is just one lone item checked off on my list. I give a wary glance at the calendar’s offerings for this afternoon. It is clear to both my calendar and me that I will not be checking off many more of the things on my list. Alas, I will not have those same feelings of satisfaction from my list today.
As I think on this, I am reminded of the saying, “We are human beings, not human doings.” I cannot find a definitive attribution for this quote so I cannot tell you who first coined this phrase. But it rings true, albeit in an uncomfortable way for me because I like the doing part of being human. (See above about my satisfaction of a completely crossed off list!)
Sometimes I wonder what God thinks about the ways we keep ourselves so busy. Of course, there will always be things to be done, but there are also things that don’t happen until we are still. I’ve always loved Psalm 46:10 that says, “Be still and know that I am God.” I’m just less good at the being still part, though I am learning.
When I manage to carve out a few minutes to just sit and be still, I am surprised how much I actually enjoy those moments. Initially my thoughts are less cooperative as they maintain their rapid pace around my brain but, given a few minutes, they, too slow just a bit. My mind wanders and I am suddenly free to notice things, like the way the birds swoop in and out of the tree that’s just outside my window. I see the way the sun dims as a cloud moves in front of it. I am able to spend a few moments just being instead of doing and oddly, that feels nice.
My reverie is interrupted by a phone call from a member who has an update for me on their condition and healing. They are frustrated by the situation and how slow things are going. I find myself saying that these things just take time, that healing is often a longer process than we would like it to be, and that sometimes we have to let go of our expectations that it will happen on our schedule. And I am immensely amused at my own words because they are a suitable reminder to this person and to me.
In a moment of stillness, I am reminded of God’s love and care for me and for all of us. So while there are still things to be done, my grip on the “to do list” is a little looser. Whether or not I check everything off is less important than many other things, including time spent with God and those around me.
